The Machinations of Machismo are soon to become the 10th wonder of the world. I am not afraid to comment on any subject and gladly welcome any intelligent machinations of your own. Its time the world had a taste of true justice, dished out Machismo style.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

The Triad Theory©

It would seem that Hooters restaurant, (which is a FAMILY restaurant mind you), is a great place to have revelations about your life as well as about life in general. On my latest visit to Hooters after a DJ gig, I had one such revelation.

The Triad Theory©

Now before you start refuting my theory, lets hear all about it. Shall we?

The Triad Theory©

First, lets assume that every person has three general categories, Looks, Brains, and Sex. (I'll speak in reference to girls, seeing as how I'm a male, just know this applies vice versa for you ladies). Now these three categories encompass a wide variety of human traits. E.g. Looks contains everything pertaining to the physical appearance of a person (body type, face, body order/scent, attractiveness, etc.). Brains contains everything pertaining to the mental state/abilities of a person (intelligence, memory, mental disorders, schizophrenia, phsycopathic tendencies, etc. etc.). Finally Sex contains everything pertaining to the sexual prowess/abilities/willingness of a person (openness, adventurous, ability, etc. etc.).

So in each category, there are traits that are plusses and those that are minuses, basically good or bad for each category. Now the sum of those traits is what makes up the overall rank of the category. With me so far?

Well now the point of the categories is that in general, only two of the three categories can ever be dominant (i.e. have a majority of plusses over minuses). So if Person A is a gorgeous girl, she can either have a great mind, or be great in bed. Still following? If Person B is a very intelligent person, she can either have great looks, or be great in bed. And lastly if Person C is very good in bed, she can either have very good looks, or a great mind.

Now obviously some people are starting to see the logic behind the theory whilst some people are skeptical saying that "Well MY girl has all three, so your theory is false!" Well my friend, that is where the previous statement of "only two of the three categories can ever be dominant" comes into play.

Consider the following, each category has a theoretical limit of 10 points it can have attributed to it. Now consider that each person gets an average of 20 total points to allocate to the categories as they see fit, or as are allocated by genetics.

Therefore your girl could have an seven in two categories with a six in the remaining, which isn't bad mind you. Now take into consideration that while that may be the case, that will have some of the negative aspects from each category. She may not be "supermodel/pinup material", or maybe she has ADD or another mental disorder, or maybe she isn't the best in bed. This is not my point however.

The bulk of where the theory comes from is dealing with the "desired girls", namely the really gorgeous ones. Now if they allocated their Looks with 10 full points, that is 10 points to allocate between the other two, so if you want them to have smarts with those looks, sex will suffer as a byproduct, likewise for sex over smarts. In my experience, this seems to generally be the case.

Keep in mind however that many people have this strange ability to "learn", hard concept for some people I know. For instance, say you have a virgin who is drop dead gorgeous and really intelligent. She can actually gain experience to get "more points" to improve her sex category. In reality, if she gets with an experienced and/or adventurous guy, they will actually both improve sexually. So there are ways to up your categories, but in general we are dealing with the "starting aspects" so to speak.

So there is the Triad Theory© in a nutshell. It isn't perfect, but for coming up with something like that at Hooters while drinking seems be be a feat in and of itself, now the only question remains. Which of my categories is lacking?

Machismo, I'm out.


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